Friday, December 23, 2011

Christmas without kids

I know it's Christmas eve eve, but I was asked how to celebrate without kids, so here you go! :)

My husband and I are lucky enough to live reasonably close to both sides of the family. We trade off each year who's side we spend it with. Our first Christmas we went to my parents (2 1/2 hours away) on Christmas eve and left as soon as the family party was over. We got home to our tiny apartment, which we had all decorated (christmas tree and lights) and opened presents. Around 2 am we headed to my husband's parents (1 1/2 hours away). We got up and did presents with them and then decided to go to my husband sister's... We had to back track home, pack and leave again, then 4 hours away. It was crazy, but one of our fondest Christmas!

I love the basic stuff (even before we had kids)... Setting up the Christmas tree, put up light, decorating, making decorations, i love painting wood and ceramic ornaments and making paper decorations with my silhouette, listening to christmas music, driving around looking at lights, and watching Christmas movies! (movie ideas: National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, Elf, Santa Clause 1, 2 & 3, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Home Alone 1 & 2, Midnight Clear, The Nativity Story, Christmas Angel, and many more!)

As a kid, my favorite memory's are of going and seeing the "Live Nativity". Coming home and roasting marshmallows, drinking hot chocolate.... Fyi, my husband and I recently discovered "stuffed lolo's" Emma calls marshmallows, lolos. You roast a marshmallow normally then after taking it off the roaster, put chocolate chips inside!!!

My favorite Christmas as a teenager was when my young womans class at church did the 12 days of Christmas for a single mom. We got money and items donated, even a Christmas tree and doorbell ditched them for 12 days to this mom and her 2 kids.

My husband and I occasionally sent out Christmas cards (not every year). In fact we haven't even sent out a card since we've had Emma!

Remember the real meaning of christmas. It is not about kids or Santa. In fact the first few years a kid doesn't even know what's going on. Em is 2 and the highlight of this Christmas has been seeing Christmas lights! Emma exclaims "oh, pretty lights" then as we leave, "bye lights!". I hope to teach Emma that Christmas isn't about what you get, but about giving and remembering Christ and feeling the spirit.

I've found the most joy at Christmas in serving others. Making goodies for friends, family and neighbors. Pick a child off the "Angel Tree" to buy gifts for. I love spending time with others and playing games! If you can, offer to baby-sit some one's kids and make cookies, decorate gingerbread houses or make gifts for their parents.


Anonymous said...

I appreciate the post. It's incredibly hard for me this time of year. I get so depressed, after 14 years of infertility. My husband and I have almost divorced twice over his overwhelming desire to be a father. After exhausting all our resources, (Save IVF which was NEVER in our budget), we just have resigned to the sadness. We haven't any chances to spend with children. We have friends that are parents in the church, but we are converts, and new to the area. No one really "trusts" us. And MANY women who distrust infertile women, as if we will go "Lifetime Movie" on them and steal their child. So, we have a hard time with people being "weirded out" by us at the same time. I long SO dearly for the "Christmas Morning" with my children. I am so desperate, that I am going to stay at my parents house tomorrow night, because I can't handle how alone we both feel come Christmas morning. Being a member of the church, pushing 40, we are incredibly lonely. I thank you for the post. I'm not the only one in my ward that is childless. Albeit, the others have nieces and nephews to spend time with. My brother has no interest in "breeding", and my in-laws are also PCOS victims. :/ I hope you have a brilliant Christmas, and God willing, a miracle will occur, and somehow I will be like Sarah and magically fall pregnant. Hah. *Issac joke there*

Kira said...

Beffy, that's really terrible about not having anyone at your church who trusts you or is close enough to you to share the joy of their children with you. And that's really weird about how some women distrust infertile women. I've never encountered that before. My heart is heavy for you. I have been blessed with a church body where I have many friends with kids, where my husband and I are kind of everyone's Aunt & Uncle. I actually teach a homeschooler art class for many of them, so I get that extra blessing of spending time with the kids. I pray that in the year that's passed since you wrote your comment, you have found friends at your church who are willing to show God's love to you and are willing to bless you by sharing their lives and children with you.