Questions and Answers

I've gotten some questions from people (in real life) about Joey leaving.

1) Does he have to go? Do you have a say in the matter?

Yes, he has to leave. Yes and No on if I have a say in the matter of a foster child leaving. Majority of the time, you have no say. Or if you are having problems with the placement you can request they be removed, which DCFS doesn't take lightly. (I can write more on that later if anyone wants the details on that subject). Or if you feel the child either returning home or moving to kinship is really unhealthy, you can fight the courts on it. Which I have never really heard of anyone doing.

In our case I have no reason to fight the judges decision, so no I don't really have much of a say in it.

2) Is it a good thing or bad thing he is leaving?

I hope it is good for him. They (dcfs) try to place childen with family. When they are trying to find/ approve family, or if no family is willing and able, is when a child is placed in a foster home. Think about it, if you had a niece/ nephew, sibling, cousin, or grandchild in foster care wouldn't you want that child to come stay with you while it's parents worked things out. Do you think it would be best for a child to live with family it knows and loves or complete strangers? Joey is our 4th out of 5 to go to family, so we're used to it.

3) Did the mom change her mind and want him back?

It isn't that easy for parents to just want the child back (in foster care).  The parents did something to get the child removed and they need to change that thing to get the child back.

Also, if the situation was in fact just adoption, different states have laws about how much time a parent has to "change thier minds" it ranges from zero time to up to months. Our state is once you relinquish you can't change your mind. They made that very clear to Samantha when she was relinquishing. So if you are a birth parent/ adoptive parent make sure you know your states laws on the matter.

Will I miss him?
Sure, but it isn't heartbreaking. He is a pretty good baby, I just know he isn't meant to be mine. There will be more foster placements in our future, so we will see what happens with those.

Any other questions?