Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Feeling pretty anxious...

This is appointment attempt #4... Yesterday I felt 75% sure it was going to happen. Right now I'm feeling pretty iffy about it.

I did talk to Sam today. There was no visit to flake out, I needed a break. We did text briefly about tomorrow. Me: "Are you excited for tomorrow?" Sam: "Yeah" Me: "Do you need a ride?" Sam: "Maybe" Me: "Okay. Just let me know."

My main hesitation, it's at 8 AM and she's not a morning person. For that reason I always feel more confident if the appointment is mid-day, even though those haven't happened. I'm now 75% sure she will "sleep though" her appointment... ahhhhh. What am I honestly expecting to happen? I don't know. I am in NO way excited. I'm anxious, nervous and stressed! I got my hopes up the day before the last appointment and you all know how that happened. If Sam didn't want me to go to the appointment with her I would flat out tell her, Don't tell me when it is, just let me know after you've gone!

What if she doesn't show? Well, she supposedly has another appointment on the 28th to check the baby's lungs. I would wait (impatiently) for then. If she doesn't go to that one? I'll deal with it then, I guess. Because she has to have a C-Section she will eventually have to go to the doctor before she can deliver so it will eventually happen! A big part of me right now wishes I wasn't so involved and like I said, she can just tell me when it's over. I just want the baby born! We're down to 6 weeks before her due date. Can he just come out yet? I have a niece and nephew who were both 6 weeks early so I kind of know how it is (as an aunt). I'll take that over all this crazy stress. I still need to finish 1 matching blanket and put the car seat in the car, which I'm going to do after the appointment (if it happens).

I have to wake up in 7 hours and the appointments in less then 9 hours. I doubt I will get much sleep.

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