Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Acceptance

Have you found that some people are more accepting about infertility and adoption then others? I defiantly have! The last ward we were in was AMAZING! They didn't questions us or give us the third degree about being LDS, Married and childless (Gasp!). They still loved us and supported us. When we did foster care I might as well of given birth when we brought home Ben! Someone brought over dinner, numerous people gave us presents for him, the list goes on and on.

Then... we moved! It's been a whole year now since we've been in our new ward and it's just not the same! I can NOT count how many "Why don't you have kids?" and "You should TRY doing this!" comments I've got! Now I'm not trying to say they are all bad, there are SOME loving supporting people in this ward, but it's not the same.

There is someone in my ward who has adopted through foster care and also has PCOS like me. Her little boys she adopted can be a handful, big time. But I've found that I love them more because I KNOW what it is like dealing with the foster care system and have a little boy just like them! I remember one Sunday when her boys were out of hand someone (who will remain nameless incase my foster care friend reads this) commented that their behavior was do to lack of parenting! I was appalled! I flashed back to one fine Sunday... during Relief Society the Primary president came in and told me Issac was being bad. I went to his class and took him to RS with me. After a little while I asked if he was going to be good, he said yes. I took him back and told his teacher that if he acted up again my husband was across the hall. Well RS ended, I walked out the door to find my husband standing there with Issac looking pretty pissed off. "Issac HIT his primary teacher!" I've talked to Issac's teacher a few times about this and she has been SO understanding about it! She gets that he has a rough life, being bounced from home to home and so on. I just don't get it, why more people don't understand that!

Well, I could go on all day on this topic so I'll leave it at this for now.

1 comment:

Liz said...

Loved reading about your foster experiences. I found your blog looking for some LDS adoption themed digital scrapbooking stuff. I too have PCOS and haven't had any pregnancy success. We went back & forth with the option to do foster to adopt as well. We were fortunate that when we finally got re-certified, it was only 1 month from liscensing that we got the call about our kids (a sibiling group of 3: a five, three, & two yr old) We've already passed the halfway mark in our 6 months with them and will be able to adopt them in April! Best of luck to you whether through fertility treatments or foster!